Author Archives: Emily A. Dause

If you ask me, we have an anger problem. I don't mean that we're angry and that's a problem. Instead, we seem to have a problem with anger itself. We have long falsely placed anger in a box of emotions labeled bad to feel, but now it's also bad emotion to communicate. "Be careful how you tell him you're upset; you could just come across as angry." "Those protestors would make their point better if they weren't so angry." "Those [insert group of people I don't agree with] are so angry all [ continue reading ... ]

When you are born, you are automatically put into one of two categories: boy or girl. Obviously, there are physical, biological reasons for this categorization of sex. But, the implications of that categorization far from stops there.* While the implications vary greatly across country and culture, in the US, being a boy or girl determines a list of gendered expectations, from what kind of clothes you wear, to what kind of toys you play with, to what colors will be your favorites, to what [ continue reading ... ]

Shortly following last November's election, a trend popped up to wear a safety pin to show you were a "safe" person for people who were degraded (and possibly endangered) by Donald Trump's rhetoric. The idea stemmed from a similar movement in the UK  following the largely anti-immigrant "Brexit" vote to leave the European Union. I never did end up wearing one, but I was touched by the idea. I had a safety pin as my facebook photo for awhile. No sooner had I become aware of the safety pin [ continue reading ... ]

You know how sometimes you find yourself using a word a lot? When a word seems to describe one thing so well you find yourself applying it to other things, too? Lately, that word for me has been "gentle." I think it started when I was choosing a race to run my upcoming half-marathon. After four years of running half and full marathons, I hadn't run long distance for a year. I wanted to get back into it, but I wanted a simple race that would ease me back into endurance running. I chose a "rail-to-trail" [ continue reading ... ]

Last month, I attended a local rally in support of refugees and immigrants. The rally was partly in response to the first version of Trump's executive order, which banned immigrants from seven predominately Muslim countries, and was later struck down in court. One of the speakers at the rally was a local pastor. As part of her address, she wanted to sing. She asked those of that recognized the song to join in: We are one in the Spirit, we are one in the Lord We are one in the Spirit, we [ continue reading ... ]

When I got married last May, I chose to take my husband's last name. I want to explain that decision. But most of all, I want to affirm that choosing how to deal with the tradition of a woman taking her husband's last name is, in fact, a decision. A woman does not have to take her husband's last name any more than he has to take hers. At the same time, all of the alternatives have their own disadvantages and complications. I am all for people who choose to take on those complications in the [ continue reading ... ]

In my post describing my decision to march in the Women's March on Washington on Saturday, January 21, I emphasized that I could only tell you my story. While that is still true, it is also true that my story is largely one of being amazed at the movement created when hundreds of thousands of individuals made the choice to stand up for themselves and for each other. I was and am overcome at having been a part of that. Here's the rest of that story. The night before the march (which was also [ continue reading ... ]

Last Saturday, January 21, 2017, I participated in the historic Women's March on Washington. Over the past few days, I have struggled with how to respond--if at all--to those who criticize or belittle the march. It's hard to know when others are truly willing to engage and try to understand and when they're simply looking for more opportunities to make their own points. For now, I've decided to start with telling my story. I can't tell you anyone else's story or perspective, but I can tell [ continue reading ... ]

My "I Voted" sticker fell off the wall the other day. I'd stuck it there on Election Day, intending to save it. I expected to have helped elect the first female president. Falling off now, it's as if the sticker senses what instead approaches. If you're looking for something new in this post, I don't exactly have anything new to say. This is me trying to process something that doesn't make intellectual or moral sense. The other night, a fellow blogger retweeted one of Donald Trump's older tweets: Sadly, [ continue reading ... ]

2016 was rough. It seems weird to say that about the year I got married. It's especially weird to say that since when people ask me how our "married life" is going, I can honestly say being married to Tom is the best part of my life right now. Sure, it's been an adjustment--and I've had my own personal struggles with change and identity--but our transition together has thus far been remarkably smooth. I mostly chalk that smooth transition up to two things: one, he is incredibly gracious and patient, [ continue reading ... ]